Love Life: Finding The Good in a Breakup

photography hawaii beach breakup

It almost always feels like the end of the world. I haven’t ever had a breakup that didn’t make me feel as though my whole world was crumbling before my eyes. It’s heartbreaking.

Que the next few weeks of going out, regrettably drunk texting your ex in tears and spending nights in eating your heart out. Then, when the dust finally starts to settle after the wreckage, there comes a moment. 

The moment is different for all of us. For me, it happened while I was laying in bed, eating an entire ice cream cake to myself weeks after my most recent breakup(we’ve all been there, am I right?)

A thought had come to me like a fleeting memory, so quick and sudden it almost passed right by. I don’t want to be sad anymore… this was the right thing, so why am I still sad?! I had thought to myself. This list is for those who have reached this moment, and are ready to see the silver lining in their breakup.

Trust the Motions

Trying to force yourself to feel positive and optimistic will only do you more harm than good. Sometimes it can be tempting when all you want is to feel better, but you know that saying.. time heals everything? It might be cliche, but it’s also so, so right.

You won’t see the good in your break up right away because you’re not meant to. That’s okay, let yourself feel the heartache.

breakup hawaii

It’s Your Time

Now that you’re single, you have much more time to invest in yourself, and your mental health. When I went through my last break up all I wanted was to feel like myself again. So, I did my best to focus on my well being and set off on a trip that gave me the time I needed to reflect on my life. Breakups can grow into motivating and inspiring life transformations if you let them.

You can be as selfish as you want during this new chapter of your life. Work on your goals, explore hobbies, exercise, travel, work hard on your career. Take care of you. You deserve it.

breakup hawaii oahu

When One Door Closes

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us” -Alexander Graham Bell

This is one of my favourite quotes, mainly because I’ve spent much too long focusing on closed doors, rather than what lay ahead. A relationship has ended. There’s been a breakup, but that doesn’t mean that everything else ends along with it.

There are new, amazing opportunities ahead if you give them a chance to present themselves. There are so many people out there in the world, so many adventures to be had, dreams to be pursued, and memories to be made.

mountain breakup

A New Chapter

This is a chance for you to create a new story, any story you want to be written. Think of something you’ve always dreamed of doing but never got the chance to. Do something that frightens you. Get out there and live your life to the fullest. You’ve been given a gift in disguise. A breakup is meant to shake you awake and hand you a fresh perspective. It’s what you do with it that makes all the difference.

How have you found the good in your past break ups? I’d love to hear about your experiences!

  • My first break up was absolutely awful. I did so many stupid things just to get over it. But what I learned when I was finally calm was to trust to the motion like you said. Accepting that it’s okay to feel pain and cry when you feel like it. Trust the process and believe that time heals almost everything.

    • Diana Maria

      Some breakups can be really tough, luckily my last was much easier to get over than the others but I’ve definitely been there too! I’m glad you pushed through it and were able to let yourself feel what you needed to in order to heal Sheene xx

  • I love this so much, and I definitely agree that we have all been there! So glad you’re feeling better and you managed to pull through xx

    Hannah | luxuryblush

    • Diana Maria

      Aw thank you Hannah, I’m glad you enjoyed the read! xx

  • NatalieLeanne

    I looooved this post Diana, and you look gorgeous by the way! I have a post coming up all about what I learnt about being single too! <3

    • Diana Maria

      Thank you Natalie! I’m excited to read that since that’s exactly where I am in my life right now xx

  • I love this, Diana! I love how you encourage people to truly feel the pain first before moving on because this is such a vital component to overcoming it. Thanks for sharing your insight and honest. So relatable and inspiring <3

    • Diana Maria

      Thank you so much Ashton! I think that’s the hardest part, but also the road towards healing. I’m glad you enjoyed the post xx

  • It’s so nice to see an uplifting chat about a breakup! I think it’s so important to invest time in yourself, especially when you’re feeling low

    Steph –

    • Diana Maria

      Thank you Steph! I couldn’t agree more. I thought it would be nice to have an uplifting post about a struggle most of us go through at one point or another 🙂

  • After my last break up, I decided to focus solely on myself for awhile. And, in the last 7 months I was able to purchase my first brand new car, I got a new job that I love, and I just purchased my first home. It’s ok to be selfish for awhile. It’s ok to do things for yourself. It’s ok to focus only on you. 🙂

    • Diana Maria

      That’s wonderful! Good for you Stephanie, I completely agree and think it can benefit those around you when you care for yourself too xx

  • They can be so hard, I’ve definitely had some bad ones in my time! But much better things have come along so it’s so important to remember that! x

    • Diana Maria

      Agreed! Good things have always come after my breakups as well which is a comforting thought xx

  • Kim

    I am lucky not to have experienced too many heartbreaks but I imagine that breaking up would feel liberating (after your heart fully heals of course). I like how uplifting this post is!

    • Diana Maria

      Thank you Kim! It definitely does feel liberating once you’ve accepted the reality and can look at it in a positive light 🙂 xx

  • Now this is inspiring! I’m so glad you feel better <3

    • Diana Maria

      Thank you Kristin 🙂

  • I’m in love with this post. Your most recent post led me to it and it’s so relevant to me right now after having just been through a break up in the last 3 weeks. I’m still healing and have sad moments but I’m getting to the point where I’m excited to spend more time on me and growing as a person and having a strong sense of self love all while being by myself! This post really helped me see that a bit more – thank you x

    Georgia Megan